Having A Choice In The Matter

Recently, someone very close to me made me really angry.  Actually, it was a lot more than anger; there was sadness, hurt, and confusion mixed in there too.  But the dominating feeling in me was anger.  After that person made me angry, I fell into a deep pit of negativity that lasted for just about two weeks.  During those two weeks, the anger weighed very heavily on me and was completely draining.  It was as if a cloud was looming over me making it difficult for me to even think straight.  Holding on to this anger everyday consumed so much energy that I could feel it eating away at me.  I knew that it wasn’t a space that I wanted to be in but still it was so hard for me to let go of the anger I felt. 

Being angry made me feel like a victim; helpless and out of control.  This victim-like energy spilled out into everything I did whether I knew it or not.  I didn’t want to smile, I didn’t want to laugh, and I didn’t want to create.  That last one was especially detrimental because my work involves creativity.  Staying angry took a lot of work and blocked me from moving forward intentionally with my life.

Until one moment when I decided I didn’t want to be “angry” anymore.  What purpose was it serving?  And did it make the original thing that made me angry go away?  Of course not.  But more importantly, I knew that holding on to that anger went against everything I knew myself to be.  And so I released it.  The anger left a hole in me that I am gently working to refill with peaceful energy day by day.

In every moment we have a choice of how we respond to the circumstances we encounter in life.  It’s where our power lies. We have the inherent freedom to choose whether to stay a victim to our own negative emotions or decide to take our power back.  What would our lives be like if we could let go of resentment, anger, and hate brought on by situations outside of control?  To turn that stress-producing energy that eats away at us into something more powerful that stimulates and strengthens us.

It begins with a choice.  Choose you.

Happy Friday Everyone!

See Beauty…


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